when you park on top of me, it hurts my feelings
Until I get around to uploading the platypus picture (see comments section of previous post), please enjoy this note I found on the windshield of my car in my office parking lot last night. AK and I spent a good half hour dissecting its weird passive-aggressiveness. A couple of things you should know:
1. All the spots in our lot are really fucking small.
2. Four out of every five people who work in my building are therapists.*
I intentionally leave lots of space so when you park between lines I won’t knock your door and vice versa. You have been parking practically on top of me with ample space on your other side—you are over the line in my driver’s side. I can’t get in unless I go through the passenger seat and crawl in that way. Thanks. :-)
AK told me someone once left her a note that said, “Lea
Anyway, I’m working on my parking skills and enjoying the fact that my blog is writing itself this week.
*Not that there’s anything wrong with therapists. If not for mine, I’d still be the kind of person who left notes in which I tried to make people think I was really nice even while telling them crappy things. But don’t you think there’s something a little therapy-speak going on here?
Comments
I believe she would feel even more stupider for the way she behaved on my message and instead ended up getting a thank you note from me. It worked when you made the opposite and positive note. :-)
I would agree to leave a happy face at the ending of the note.
I think if you have yet to work on your own issues, then, yes, it is possible to view this note in a negative light. Sometimes it's hard to see past the hostility that we have come to expect from other people. It's especially difficult when we don't let go of the past. I intentionally have let go of past conflicts and negative expectations. Unintentionally--or maybe accidentally on purpose--I do park my b*llshit close to total strangers. :)
Quite the note you got there. Thanks for posting it.
I used to keep an extra supply of bank deposit envelopes in the glove compartment just for this kind of communication, but I haven't left a note in years.
Hey, have you heard of:
http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
?
CW: Thanks for commenting. I have to disagree, though. I don't think my inability to process my past is what's preventing me from seeing the note-writer's beautiful soul. I'm sure she/he has a fine soul, but she/he also has an asshole side, and I just want him/her to own it.
PV: Great site--thanks for the link!
I'm still trying to get my mom to stop prefacing requests with, "Would you like to..." in favor of a direct question.
C: My dad is, in some ways, the most direct person I know, but he has this habit of trying to convince people that what they want happens to be what he wants.
Case in point this past weekend: Instead of saying, "Can you drive instead of taking the train so that you'll get here earlier? Because I'd like you to be here earlier," he went with, "Are you sure taking the train is a good use of your time? I know time is really valuable to you."
Oh well, he made me waffles when I got home, which was really valuable to me.
Monday club music was blasting from the building next door till midnight and I wanted to yell "knock it off!" out the window really loud.
"It works in New York City" I said. "This isn't New York City" Kim said. So I made an anonymous noise complaint to the Sheriff instead.
This leads me to think - it was a client, not a therapist that left the note.
Therapist note would read: "When you park too close to the edge of the space, I feel frustrated and angry because I have to crawl in through the passenger door of my car. Please park further to the left." That's actually what a therapist would call an "I statement".
signed,
Daughter of a Therapist
Because that's what a decade of therapy and some hard core pharmaceuticals will do for you.
M: Awesome. Hippy wagons need elbow room, man.
A: My college roommate used to call the cops on our noisy neighbors all the time, but that was mostly because she thought cops were hot. I wonder what a therapist would say about that....
TL: I wish you worked in my building.
http://rumkin.com/fun/clutter/parking_tickets.pdf
--b52