the identified patient

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 The Identified Patient


Is crying again

Is talking too much

Made it all about her

Brought up the thing we agreed not to talk about

Is letting her child watch YouTube again

Is letting him see her tired face, shiny with tears

Sent a bitter text and drafted a worse one

Ate all the Cheez-Its and drank your Coke

Is not over it

Is moving on too quickly

Is not taking a break

Is not asking the pregnant woman about her due date

Does not want to be at this party, and it shows

Did not keep your work deadlines in mind

Is not getting the right kind of therapy

Is too much like your mother and her own father

Blogged about it

Got fat

Worried and worried and worried

Flew too close to the sun

Hates fun

Wasted years

Is obsessed with productivity

Acts like no one suffers but her

Nags too much and not enough

Can’t win

Uses annoying phrases like “I can’t win”

Doesn’t see how much she’s won

Is steeped in guilt like water becoming the blackest tea

Is sorry

Apologizes too much

Wants her child and someone else’s

Wants you

Is mad at you

Is too loud

Drowns everyone out

Drowns

Is dragging herself back from the depths

Dripping with sludge, so much and so disgusting,

You never notice how strong her arms are

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