Friday, August 18, 2006

two truths and a lie

The last time I’d played the game was at cheerleading camp the summer before junior year. This time, when I walked into the party, a chick named Blue was saying she’d been a pimp for a while. And that was one of her truths. No one at cheer camp had even lied about anything that outrageous.

We were at AK’s ex’s house for a Gay Girls’ Game Night (and what is more gay-girlish than hanging out with your current’s ex?). The first few people who went had truths like “I used to identify as transgendered” and lies like “I have 14 tattoos” (she only had six). I wracked my brain for what to say, and realized that most of the quirky truths I could summon were the same quirky truths I could summon in high school. Was I really that boring? Was I really the only girl at the party who’d never worked in the sex industry?

I was relieved when someone’s lie was “I race BMX bikes,” and someone else’s truth was “I won a year’s supply of Maybelline cosmetics.”

In my head, I rehearsed the following:

1. I used to carry a rat around on my shoulder.
2. I once got the boot on my car for unpaid parking tickets.
3. My name is on the Mira Costa High School record wall for bench-pressing.

I invite you to guess the lie. But I never got to stump the GGGN crowd, because the conversation dissolved into a more general party with more general topics. Or at least as general as GG’s go—there were topics like “So seriously, you were a pimp?” and “My cat likes to eat sourdough bread” and “I hate bisexuals” (and don’t you think that hating bisexuals is a bit overdone? Doesn’t that make you more of a cliché than straight girls who make out with their best female friends at parties?).

Blue the Pimp told me that I look like her friend Nicole. I assume Nicole isn’t one of her hoes—partly because hoes, if they want to work, would probably need better haircuts than the one I got yesterday. I like it from the back, but I don’t see much of the back of my head, so—for the same self-centered reason I wanted a tattoo in a place I could see—I wish I didn’t look so much like a mushroom from the front. Sad but true.

3 comments:

Nance said...

I think #2 is the lie. You seem far too conscientious to accrue parking tickets. You also seem like the type to love all kinds of animals and probably did have a pet rat who rode around on your shoulders. And why provide a hyperlink for a lie? :-)

erin said...

I'm going with #3. Not that I doubt you hold a school record in the bench-press... I'd bet that's the gosh-darn truth. I'm thinking you're trying to pull a fast one and that they don't actually keep their records on the wall. Instead the names of record-holders are engraved onto a plaque that sits in a glass display case. And so your name is on the plaque in the display case... but not on the wall.

Cheryl said...

Oh, I wish I was in a glass display case instead of scrawled on a piece of construction paper and slotted into the wall in the smelly weight room.

Anyway, Nance guessed right. I guess my OCD-esque sense of responsibility even seeps into my blog.