Thursday, April 29, 2010

sometimes i envy the amish*

Things I’m worrying about today:
  • The fact that my cell phone is going to give me a brain tumor. No, really.
  • The fact that I’m too lazy and/or addicted to modern life to return to the way of the landline.
  • Planning my vacations. ‘Cause, you know, not getting the best possible deal on airfare is right up there with racial profiling and torture and brain tumors.
  • The fact that OC has taken to barfing up his special food, substituting one health issue for another.
  • The fact that I forgot to call the vet today, not because I was so busy writing my congressperson or even working but because I was thinking about my vacations.
  • The fact that life sometimes seems to spin faster and faster, even though I’m almost positive I could make choices that would make it less spinny.
  • The maze that is health insurance. Even good health insurance. Even the kind with doctors who are in almost no danger of being abducted by the military.
  • The fact that maybe my circus novel is structured in a boring, too-easy way. I’m in the middle of T.C. Boyle’s The Women and even though I’m not totally in love with it, he does really smart things with narration and chronology. Should I fuck with the timeline in my novel somehow? Then again, there’s something to be said for keeping things simple.

*This was especially true in my bonnet-wearing, Little House-loving youth. Back then I couldn’t imagine anything cooler than sitting on the porch churning butter, gazing at your pony as he nibbled sugar cubes. Now it doesn’t seem quite as cool, but it does seem really restful. And, let’s be honest, boring, which is why I’ve complicated my life with the above. But still. Homemade butter and ponies!


Tracy Lynn said...

I feed my cats the live food enzyme sprinkle on their food, and they almost never throw up anymore. Of course now that I have typed that, I am very afraid.

Cheryl said...

My vet gave me some of that, and I was actually worried that might be what was making him throw up. But maybe I was not so much sprinkling as shoveling. How much do you put on?

Sizzle said...

Now I don't want to use my cell phone. Why does everything good have to be bad? BOO!

Cheryl said...

And it turns out that Oreo milkshakes are bad for you too. Can you believe it?

Signe said...

Ponies and bonnets are pretty tempting eh. But hey, do like I do, buy a bonnet on eBay and go visit the nearest horse stable. Solves half your problems.

Claire said...

Well, I'm going to ignore that comment about Oreo milkshakes since I was tempted to get one the other day.

As for cells... I recommend living somewhere with sketchy reception. Suddenly landlines become tres appealing.

Never liked Little House, but I confess I dig regularly driving by the small/quasi-farms around here. I prefer pygmy goats, but there are ponies around too. And llamas, sheep, cows, chickens, horses. And an enormous black pig that naps by someone's front porch some days... a new fave.

Cheryl said...

S: I'm there.

C: Country living is way safer than urban, I'm sure, where we're all crisscrossed with invisible waves. But at least I don't have to worry about getting squished by a giant sleeping pig.

Peter Varvel said...

Your life is a constant trial . . . to me.
As I become more crotchety in my old age, I prefer to spend even less time on the phone - so thank you for reinforcing one of the justifications!